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Thus I strove to keep my heart above the waters of fear, nor knew
that she whom I distrusted was indeed my defence from the realities
I took for phantoms: her light controlled the monsters, else had
I scarce taken a second step on the hideous ground. "I will not
be appalled by that which only seems!" I said to myself, yet felt
it a terrible thing to walk on a sea where such fishes disported
themselves below. With that, a step or two from me, the head of
a worm began to come slowly out of the earth, as big as that of a
polar bear and much resembling it, with a white mane to its red neck.
The drawing wriggles with which its huge length extricated itself
were horrible, yet I dared not turn my eyes from them. The moment
its tail was free, it lay as if exhausted, wallowing in feeble effort
to burrow again.
"Does it live on the dead," I wondered, "and is it unable to hurt
the living? If they scent their prey and come out, why do they leave
me unharmed?"
I know now it was that the moon paralysed them.
All the night through as I walked, hideous creatures, no two
alike, threatened me. In some of them, beauty of colour enhanced
loathliness of shape: one large serpent was covered from head to
distant tail with feathers of glorious hues.
I became at length so accustomed to their hurtless menaces that I
fell to beguiling the way with the invention of monstrosities, never
suspecting that I owed each moment of life to the staring moon.
Though hers was no primal radiance, it so hampered the evil things,
that I walked in safety. For light is yet light, if but the last
of a countless series of reflections! How swiftly would not my feet
have carried me over the restless soil, had I known that, if still
within their range when her lamp ceased to shine on the cursed spot,
I should that moment be at the mercy of such as had no mercy, the
centre of a writhing heap of hideousness, every individual of it as
terrible as before it had but seemed! Fool of ignorance, I watched
the descent of the weary, solemn, anxious moon down the widening
vault above me, with no worse uneasiness than the dread of losing
my way--where as yet I had indeed no way to lose.
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