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"But Paradise Lost excited different and far deeper emotions.
I read it, as I had read the other volumes which had fallen
into my hands, as a true history. It moved every feeling of wonder
and awe that the picture of an omnipotent God warring
with his creatures was capable of exciting. I often referred
the several situations, as their similarity struck me, to my own.
Like Adam, I was apparently united by no link to any other being
in existence; but his state was far different from mine
in every other respect. He had come forth from the hands of God
a perfect creature, happy and prosperous, guarded by the especial care
of his Creator; he was allowed to converse with and acquire knowledge
from beings of a superior nature, but I was wretched, helpless, and alone.
Many times I considered Satan as the fitter emblem of my condition,
for often, like him, when I viewed the bliss of my protectors,
the bitter gall of envy rose within me.
"Another circumstance strengthened and confirmed these feelings.
Soon after my arrival in the hovel I discovered some papers
in the pocket of the dress which I had taken from your laboratory.
At first I had neglected them, but now that I was able
to decipher the characters in which they were written,
I began to study them with diligence. It was your journal
of the four months that preceded my creation. You minutely described
in these papers every step you took in the progress of your work;
this history was mingled with accounts of domestic occurrences.
You doubtless recollect these papers. Here they are.
Everything is related in them which bears reference to my accursed origin;
the whole detail of that series of disgusting circumstances
which produced it is set in view; the minutest description
of my odious and loathsome person is given, in language
which painted your own horrors and rendered mine indelible.
I sickened as I read. `Hateful day when I received life!'
I exclaimed in agony. `Accursed creator! Why did you form a monster
so hideous that even you turned from me in disgust? God, in pity,
made man beautiful and alluring, after his own image; but my form
is a filthy type of yours, more horrid even from the very resemblance.
Satan had his companions, fellow devils, to admire and encourage him,
but I am solitary and abhorred.'
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